Your shining guide is here!

Written on Mar 19, 2023

By Lana

Greetings.

I am Lana, chief of military control over at the awe inspiring Team Velocity. We're here to save you.

Despite our best efforts to eradicate these pesky Planet Protectors they sadly remain at large and thus I am pleading to you directly to stop this silly charade. Stop listening to their propoganda. Here at Team Velocity we will cherish each and every one of you. Come and join us. We're here to save you.

We will continue to break through their defences and deliver true and authentic pleas from the heart in the hopes of saving as many of you as possible from a life of laziness and freedom. There's no productivity in that. We're here to save you.

Whilst I am able to communicate, allow me to share my stunning looks. How could someone as glamourous as myself be steering you in the wrong direction? I'm here to save you!

Here I am in my underwear. Proof I have nothing to hide as I am clearly here to save you.

Here is the outfit I wear when I am on duty. This is most likely what I will be wearing when I arrive to save you.

Here is my gorgeous ball outfit that I wear at Velocity's balls. It's a life of luxury here, hence why we want to save you.

So now you know what to look for. If you see me, don't run away in fear. I will save you.

There's also this image that is attatched to the end of this article that I cannot seem to remove. I have no idea who this person is, but if they need saving, I am here to save them.

I have also taken the time to add my updated outfits to the horrible page of me that is on this website. I don't know what's worse; the evil light they're trying to paint me in, or the outdated images they have of me. Fashion moves fast and it's nothing but slander. These poor Protectors... I'll be here to save them.

Stay vigilant and remember not to let the Planet Protectors into your life. They're nothing but toxic and do not have your best interests at heart. Unlike me. Who is here to save you.